Far from perfect

This should come as no big shock, but I everyday I am seeing in myself things that I do not like. I am not who I want to be and who God wants me to be. But, I see no time to complain and feel pitiful- I am still loved!! God is so awesome and no matter who I am right now or have been in the past, He still loves me and wants to be close to me.

I have always heard that you don't have to get well before you go see a doctor, but I never realized how true it is. God has reached out to me despite all of my weaknesses and begun to change me into who He wants me to be. Now, this is not a fast process and I will always have flaws, but some things that I hate the most in myself have become less and less a part of who I am.

So, while I am not perfect, I know that God still loves me and is ready to change me even now. Thank you, God!!

"Indescribable, uncontainable,
You placed the stars in the sky and You know them by name.
You are amazing God!
Incomparable, unchangeable
You see the depths of my heart and You love me the same.
You are amazing God!"
~Chris Tomlin "Indescribable"

D.T.R.

I assume that most college students know what that stands for: Define The Relationship. I don't know about you, but at Taylor, I have a feeling that DTRs do not have a good connotation. But I'm not here to talk about what you may think of a DTR- it's too painful =P.

This Sunday, my pastor talked about DTRs: with God. While I wasn't too sure about the ideas at first, I realized that this works out well. Wherever you are, whoever you are, whatever you believe, it is not bad to have a DTR with/ about God. Know what you believe and want for your relationship with God. You may have reasons you don't want to get to know Him, you may hate Him, or you may desire to know Him more. Whatever it may be, talk about it with Him (if you don't believe in God, pretend or just work it out in your mind).

Now, a DTR is not complete without both parties participating, and I know God wants to participate. Check out His word, the Bible, and see what He has to say about His relationship with you.

There; it's not that hard or any more painful than a "normal" DTR and it may help you know why you act as you do, believe what you do and are who you are.

My second "real" job

Today was my first day of my internship at Marathon Petroluem. "You mean, like the gas station?" Well, sort-of. See Marathon does a lot more than just sell you the gas for your car. They do everything from drilling the oil to refining it, to shipping it across the USA, and selling it to you at your local gas station. That requires a lot of people and work. My job this fall will be wroking on programs that will help those in the accounting group do their job better.

I don't know what I will exactly be doing, but I know I will be coding in Natural and JCL (two things I DON'T know, by the way). It should be good, though. My mentor is helpful and fun; my supervisor is helpful and nice. I'm just not sure I'm ready to be back working 8-5 everyday. You know, I really do enjoy being a student!